Deep Thoughts & Cheap Shots

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Jun. 16th, 2005 @ 09:59 am (no subject)

Also, Apparently Rainbow already has an Andy (the Andy Army is everywhere), so for dispatch purposes I will have to choose a differnt name. My first thought is 'Rufus' maybe 'Kosgrove' as my second choice. Any suggestions?

Plus, I can now prep my giving notice and big FUCK-OFF to Air Traffic. "Why I no longer want to work for you..." (the ultimate answer, the owner (also named Jim) is like Jim Peterson, Jr.)

Now I must find a circular path so that I might run a victory lap.

I AM VICTORIOUS!

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Jun. 16th, 2005 @ 09:45 am ...ladies & gentlemen, a big round of applause for...

Minnesota's Newest Taxi Driver!

City called me this morning, my provisional license is approved! I also have my first training this afternoon with Rainbow Taxi. I have to get my 'taxi driver physical' to get my DOT health card and take some city classes and I get my regular license, but I can start driving now. The 'taxi driver physical' is a special, incredibly LESS thorough examination for the super low standards cabdrivers have to meet.

Rock!

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Jun. 15th, 2005 @ 03:13 am fridayFRIDAYfriday!!!!

The new Hayao Miyazaki movie opens this weekend! Howl's Moving Castle! It's about a Castle, it Moves, and ummm it's owned by Howl... It's directed by Miyazaki! He did Spirited Away and Princess Mononoke and one of the best movies ever, My Neighbor, Totoro

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Jun. 11th, 2005 @ 02:12 am (no subject)

Your computer is not geeky enough. I mean really. Where's your drawbridge? huh? Why is your computer not lighting up your life like an amazing disco Rubik's Cube, mmmm?

Because you have a life?

Very well. Carry on then.

Today, I tore apart and rebuilt two room fans they both now work. Cross-breeze is sweet. One, Fooz, is a sleek ricer of of modern fan technology. The other is Monstro, and all steel behemoth box fan from another age. It has two settings 'High' and 'Higher'. If you dare put Mostro on carpet on the 'Higher' setting, he will laugh and promptly blow himself over onto his back. "My intake is now blocked and I shall push no cooling breeze! A-ha-ha-HA-ha!"

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Jun. 8th, 2005 @ 10:53 pm By Order of General Patton

List five songs that you are currently digging, agent ... it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words or even if they're approved by the proper authorities, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artist and the song in your blog along with your five songs. Then proceed with mission initiatives in a cool and efficient manner. Make it look like an accident.

1. Great Dub in the Sky, Easy Star All Stars, from "Dub Side of the Moon"

2. Mother, Luther Wright & the Wrongs, from "Rebuild the Wall"

3. Movin' Right Along, Kermit & Fozzie, from "The Muppets: Music, Mayhem and More"

4. Verb: That's What's Happening, Moby, from "Schoolhouse Rock Rocks!"

5. I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For, Negativland (featuring an abortive long distance dedication by Casey Kasem and a little dog named 'Snuggles'), from "U2"

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May. 18th, 2005 @ 02:04 pm Oh swell

So I find that someone decided to smash my windshield for no particular reason last night. Lovely.

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May. 13th, 2005 @ 04:04 am (no subject)

Rejected "Love is..." cartoons: http://theendofhumor.blogspot.com/

which I found linking offa: http://ifuckedanncoulterintheasshard.blogspot.com/

which I found on http://www.memepool.com/

which is from my bookmarks.

And one for Combustafarian! More information on disc golf than you ever need. Check out the stuff under 'Resources' (Six pages on the four grades of plastic used for golf discs. Six!)
http://www.discgolfreview.com/

While I'm at it here's a primer on the physics of Frisbee flight:
http://www.mansfieldct.org/schools/MMS/staff/hand/Flightfrisbee.htm

Interesting because I had no idea that there was a Bernouli Principle. Which is that the pressure in a fluid decreases as the speed of the fluid increases.

And funny cartoon with many archives:
http://www.drinkatwork.com/mediumlarge.html

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May. 7th, 2005 @ 02:33 am The Darth Side

What's behind the mask? Just another tormented soul with a need to unload upon the cold, harsh sea of sith-free humanity...

http://darthside.blogspot.com/

A samplin':

~ ~ ~ ~

Parenting 101

Okay, I admit it. I cut off the kid's hand. Everything went downhill after that.

Blast! Blast! Blast! I am such an idiot.

I surveilled my son as he walked through the city, my eyes closed, my back to the security monitors. His spirit danced and rained, his emotions farting out bright, flickering clouds of micro-causal flotsam in every direction. Lumbering arcs of probability swung around him in sick, drunken orbits, any one of them threatening to actualize at a sneeze.

Quite a lightshow, really. People who cannot see the Force have no idea what they are missing.

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Apr. 25th, 2005 @ 12:05 am footprints musings

There is that inspirational-type story where you and Jesus are out strolling on a beach in... let's say Ecuador. At the end of your constitutional, You look back and see a variable number of footprints. Jesus says, "Dude, you weren't going solo. I was carrying you. I can't help it, My therapist says I have a matyr complex." Or something like that.

Wait. I usually remember when I am being hoisted bodily. Why am I missing time from a just completed walk? Has The Lord been slipping me a Mickey? Did He perform some miracle* and when my jaw dropped He shot a Roofie into my gaping maw with His wrist-rocket? What about the possibilty that me and He were both hopping one-legged or Saviour-boy was showing off for the ladies with a little barefoot surfing?

Most importantly, How would you like to be carried by Jesus?

I would chooose...

Chicken Fight-style, just in case we meet any other feisty dieties.

*He defeated Skeletor once and for all time.

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Apr. 24th, 2005 @ 11:19 pm Is this thing on?

Hello? Long time caller, first time listener.

Tap. Tap Tap. Check Cheque Czech.

New to my world is YoYoMaze, software to teach me how to do 70+ yoyo tricks. A walloping bargain clearance priced less employee discount = five bucks and change. It also was one of only four copies that featured a bonus: Free YoYo in the box! A Henry's Lizard, which retails, on a shelf under 3 feet away, for the princely sum of $13. And I get a spiffy tutorial software to boot. I couldn't see the color of the yoyo prior to purchase, the only modest setback. Fugly lemon yellow. So I swapped it for a keener see-thru yellow model. This joins my see-thru blue Duncan Freehand Zero in my Arsenal of Yo. Joins, hell, it surpasses. The Freehand Zero was a 'hiring bonus'. It's a decent yoyo, but not so much to my liking.

YoyoMaze are stored on a high shallow shelf, unreachable without a stepladder or really tall person (gee, wonder why they haven't been selling). My preferred method for getting them down has been to whip a juggling bean bag at the boxes on the shelf. Kinetics generally results in one tumbling down for my to catch rakishly.

Also I hung a loaded Space Gorilla repeating rubberband gun behind the register with a small sign that says "Complaints Department." Customers were amused. I'm sure a manager will take it down. "Marketing indicates that potental buyers prefer bland. Quirky may upset some." That will sound like a complaint to me; I will shoot them with many a rubberband.

Now stay tuned for local deprogramming...

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